You know the term non-scale victories, right? It’s from the weight loss world on social media. My HIDE FROM FEED finger gets a bit itchy when anyone starts talking about grams of protein, but I do stop when I see #NSV.
It’s not a wild concept, but also… it kind of is. Non-scale victories celebrate healthy stuff but not actual weight loss. Choking down a kale salad, for example, or running a little farther than the day prior without being chased. Choices that don’t measure on the scale but still matter.
Knowing your daily fiber intake may not bring me joy, but seeing you celebrate intangible wins might. That’s some radical-self compassion, and we could all use an extra scoop of that in our breakfast shakes.
I’m not trying to lose weight (at the moment, anyway), but I am trying to get a novel published. Both are somewhat demoralizing endeavors, and both tie your worth to a concrete measurement at the end. Publication, like a goal weight, is a simple and universal indicator of success. If you’re good, they’ll publish you, and if you’re not, they won’t. Right?
The heck if I know. But I do know it’s distilled that way for the majority of the reading public, and it’s what people ask about when we’re catching up. When is the book coming out? Who’s your publisher? Where can I read it?
No one is trying to make me feel bad. But the answers—”maybe never” and “on my Google Drive,” respectively—and their accompanying sad trumpet sound certainly can.
So I think I need to take a page from the weight loss world and celebrate some non-publishing victories.
Happily, this idea has occurred to me before. Here’s a list I found in an old notebook, on a page otherwise filled with the stream-of-consciousness ravings of a madwoman.
Vision boards are probably nice, but I’d also recommend making a list of goals and then losing it for several months. It was validating to find this one now that I’ve managed to check off all the items without dying.
So no, I don’t have an agent or a publisher, but behold! I’ve done a bunch of things I didn’t think I could, and those are victories, damn it.
And, AND! This week, I started on another book. Considering how many times I thought about pushing a Sharpie through my eye whilst editing the first one, I’m calling that a non-publishing victory as well.
I share not so you’ll congratulate me on my middling accomplishments (although you are welcome to do so), but just in case you could stand to recognize a non-victory victory in your life, too.
Whatever your field, I’m sure there’s One Great Victory everyone’s pushing for. When I was teaching, for example, it was improving ILEARN scores. Oh boy, did we do everything in the world to improve our ILEARN scores. We went to conferences, wrote special lessons, bought new materials, dropped to our knees at a golden Scantron statue in the cafeteria, etc. We might have cleansed the school with a burning bundle of Ticonderogas if we thought the scoring machines could register good vibes.
And yet my ILEARN scores consistently sucked.
So I learned to celebrate non-ILEARN victories. You know, the little things: building relationships with students, inspiring kids to read, lifting their confidence as humans. Trifles, really. While they didn’t affect my staggering earning potential, those things still made me feel like I was doing something that mattered.
I suspect you are also doing something that matters, even if it doesn’t measure.
Maybe today you can also borrow from the weight loss folks and think about what you’ve done on the way to that One Great Victory. Small things. Kind things. You-specific things. Things that don’t make a splash, exactly, but that still send ripples of goodness into the pond of humanity.
If last week was about relieving some anxiety with what we’ve lived through, maybe this week can be about relieving some pressure. I recommend giving yourself credit if you can and raw kale only if you have to. And time to enjoy the long weekend.
